I like to be very direct when I praise the divine. I tend to skip over God and focus my worship right on the yeast. I know that technically it is just a fungus but I feel that every time I brew my prayers are answered in the form of sweet intoxicating alcohol.
ALL HAIL SACCAROM! LAY YOUR NUTRIENT UPON THE ALTAR AND BEG FOR ATTENUATION!
Remember kids, the definition is insanity is to brew the same beer over and over and expect the same results.
I opened a 50lbs bag of two row pale malt but discovered that every grain in the bag had been consumed by iridescent beetles. “Welp, at least that explains the writhing,” I thought as I fired up the drill and started grinding bugs through the mill. Juicy little buggers; quite a spray. I wondered if these beetles have enough enzymes too convert all the starches as the strike water steamed up with a nutty aroma. Nailed my mash temp; beetle exoskeletons do a decent job setting an insect bed. First runnings were a respectable 1.090. Good work little bugs, good work. Magnum for bittering then citra at five minutes and a bit more after flame out to steep during whirlpool. OG was 1.072. Pitched brettanomyces at 21degrees. The wort had shimmering opalescence and smelled like tri-fold records from the 70s.